Archive for the ‘JS Communication’ Category

Me vs. myself – the wrong pronoun is winning

I’m a grammar nerd. And a music fan. That’s why I always got a chuckle at the title of the mega popular 90s jam band Phish tune called “You Enjoy Myself.” The intentional misuse of the reflexive pronoun “myself” was meant to be cheeky. Nowadays, I think people are starting to miss the joke.

The recent example of “myself abuse” that led to this post came from New York Governor David Paterson, a politician and de facto professional communicator, and was delivered on the national stage.

“I’m looking forward to a full investigation of actions taken by myself and my administration but I give you this personal oath,” Paterson said. “I have never abused my office, not now, not ever.”

Personal vow: if I am ever accused of professional misconduct or abusing an elected office, I will not start my public defense with bad grammar.

Another, more common misuse of “myself,” even from senior communicators who should know better, goes something like this: “If you have any questions, see John, Mary or myself.” Remove John and Mary from the mix and you get, “If you have any questions, see myself.” Ouch.

Grammar Girl has already posted a tidy explanation of the proper use of the reflexive pronoun “myself,” so I won’t repeat it. Check it out here.

The point is: Why are otherwise solid grammarians compelled to abuse “myself?” I sometimes get the feeling that they’re attempting to come across smarter, more mannered or perhaps even humble. Like somehow saying “me” – even when it’s correct – makes you a “me, me, me” person.

Let’s not fall into that trap. Good grammar is a prerequisite for good communications if you ask myself.

Heard any especially painful examples of “myself abuse” recently? Tell myself about them in the comments. I’m going to compile a book or something.

A hang-up I’d like to share

Cell phones are marvelous inventions.

They allow us to work virtually, to share special moments in real-time and on more than one occasion they have even saved lives.  But, as wonderful as they are, they also have a dark side.   They can rob us of the joy of quiet reflection, they can act as an electronic time waster and they can contribute to serious injuries and even death.

For a long time, I have thought to myself that cell phones needed a warning label, much like we find on beer cans and other consumer products.

I’m amazed at how many intelligent adults lose all sense of decorum when their ear is distracted by the call of their “own private Idaho.” I have squirmed in a nice Chinese restaurant while a man in a business suit reviewed the particulars of his failed marriage within earshot of my grade-school children.  This particular conversation was laced with many small words that they hadn’t yet learned and I didn’t want to define.

I silently seethe as my own sweet sister lets call after call interrupt the beauty and mental continuity of our shared walk on a winding mountain road. What is intended as catch-up time suddenly is tossed aside as a lost moment in time.

I have watched young mothers pick up their toddlers from school with nary a word to their child while yakking away into a palm-sized piece of plastic about something apparently more important.

What kind of messages are we sending with our compulsive communications addiction? Using cell phones is appropriate in certain settings, but not in others. We all need to exercise more self-control.

What disturbs me the most are the hundreds of motorists who seem to think that calling and driving are compatible activities. That’s why I was thrilled when 11Alive asked us to help get the word out about the 11Alive Great Hang Up to educate Atlantans about the dangers of texting and driving.

The station put drivers from all walks of life on a test course and measured how their performance was affected by incoming calls and texts. Turns out, talking on a Bluetooth is just as bad as driving drunk.  You can see for yourself here.

I hope that companies, families and individuals will take the time to watch this coverage and take the pledge to hang up while driving.  You can download the pledge here.   Everyone talks about the importance of having this conversation with young drivers.  I agree, but it’s the adult drivers who first need to hang up and have a conversation with themselves about the example they are setting.

Great Hang Up

Three keys to effective communication

In a blog post last week, I asked two questions: What makes for an effective communicator?  What makes for effective communications?

This week, I want to explore some of my thoughts on how to answer those questions.

Let’s take the latter question first. Effective communication equals genuine conversations. It is all about two-way communication — dialogue not monologue. It is tempting to replace the word authentic with genuine with the above definition but I believe that would be a mistake. Genuine is simply a more precise word. To be genuine means to be three things: be available, vulnerable and reliable.

So, now we can answer the first question. An effective communicator must be able to be available with their time. They must not be afraid to show their emotions at the right moment, especially with their inner circle. They are also reliable – they are leaders others can depend on unequivocally.

Most of all, effective communicators speak with sincerity and authority. This is the most powerful combination.

Effective communicators also use stories and images to make their communications come to life. I recently heard Super Bowl-winning Coach Tony Dungy speak. He was incredibly effective. Why?

He was sincere and did not hold back on what he wanted to say about various life lessons. Did he blow me away with the style part of his speech? No.

Was he Mr. Telegenic? No. And it did not matter.

I will never forget how he commanded my attention on stage, the stories he told and how he showed his heart to those attending.

When he finished his talk, there was no doubt about the sincerity of his remarks and the authority in which he delivered these remarks.  Leaders are always communicators.

Fresh Look at Familiar Leaders

If you have not read the book 1776 by David McCullough, I recommend you put this Pulitzer Prize winner on your 2010 reading list. Or if you already have read it, take it off the bookshelf, dust it off and give it a second pass. (more…)

If Gutenberg had invented the Internet instead

As you judge ponder the New York Times’ much-maligned plan to charge non-subscribers for unlimited access to its online content, try this little thought experiment: imagine if the Internet had been around a lot longer. I mean since Johannes Gutenberg kind of longer. (more…)